Riding Mariah Carey to work

Ah the matatu; Isuzu's gift to Kenya. Before coming here this was one of my major concerns as I knew that they were the primary mode of transport around the city. After one week's commuting however both Gareth and I are finding ourselves amongst the impatient passengers thinking 'why don't you mount the pavement and get out of this queue?'. Traveling on one is not for the claustrophobic, those faint of heart or anyone with a desire to maintain dignity. 14 passenger seats (and sometimes more passengers than seats) are squeezed in along with one for the driver and the conductor, who sits by the sliding door via which passengers board or alight the vehicle, which doesn't always come to complete halt at the stops. Boarding and alighting can be an intimate experience. It is such a tight squeeze that arses are in faces, shopping, luggage, tvs and much more can be passed around. Everyone has a say in how they are driven and will tell the driver so, plus they will stop wherever you want them to, communal taxis if you will.

The matatu has evolved out of Nairobi's dire traffic situation, jams here make the Headingley run look mild. Regular buses are not so common and most people can't afford a car. So matatus are in fact the most convenient form of moving around the city. In the mornings we get one just outside of our flat and in the evening we get dropped off about 10 mins walk away next to a small shopping centre for our groceries. Routes seem to vary slightly every day so you just have to state where you want to alight else you'll get lost.

Matatus don't really stop at roundabouts, create extra lanes and often just go down the pavement or grass verges down the middle of dual carriageways if its too busy on the actual lanes, beeping at pedestrians who dare to be in their way. Apparently mirror, signal, manoeuvre is replaced by manoeuvre, beep horn, manouvre some more, laugh. There is a great camaraderie amongst the crews, who have their own uniform and a union. You will find that their impatience on the roads occasionally gives way to letting another matatu through and having a good chat at 40mph on the way by.

The matatu is where our pigeon swahili learning really benefits us as we try not to pay mazungo prices and ask confidently 'pesa ngapi?' (how much?). Rain makes the fares go up however and it is hard to predict what you will pay then, or how long it will take you to get to work. Journeys can take three times as long.

The owners and crews originally competed for business by 'pimping' their vehicles, fitting loud stereo systems, themed colour schemes and all manner of livery and signage. Apparently they would follow fashions very quickly in the earlier days, so if madonna was number one there would be her name and pictures plastered all over it, only to be exchanged two weeks later when Beyonce or whoever replaced her. Music is still a common feature, with some sticking to the radio but others playing music of certain themes. Reggae is very popular, as is hip-hop, 80s and early 90s pop and house feature strongly, and there's always some surprises. We were 'treated' to country and western on our way out yesterday.

Yesterday I experienced the notorious 'vehicles on cables' variety, whilst traveling to town with a Kenyan colleague. Identifiable by their numberplates these matatus will cost you more but guarantee that they will do anything possible to get you there as fast as they can. This often includes driving on grass verges, taking different roads at a breakneck speed and, occasionally, getting stuck in ditches, taking about 6 men to push one out.

By far the most entertaining aspect of the matatu fleet are the names, which range from predictable ('Theatre of Dreams' 'In God we trust' 'Yes we Can') the street ('Daddi's, 'Get Clunkd', 'We Out Against Da Grain', 'I Love This Game') which Gareth often cruises into the Kibera in, the ones to avoid ('Slaughter Hauz', 'Spills', 'Ganja Head') to the outright bizarre- ('Mariah Carey', 'Only on the Facebook', 'Working Class').

Alas times are hard for the matatu as the government cracks down on these private enterprises. Already there are rules which ban music, insist on seatbelts and sticking to the correct number of passengers. If you find yourself on one of the many not obeying these rules you may find you get turfed off inexplicably before a roundabout, where the police hang out, and then have to walk. We have been told that matatus are going to be phased out of use completely come January next year. At that point we may find ourselves out in protest with the matatu unions!

JMH